5 out of 13: A tribute to the great man ‘Fatty’ Vautin and the legendary Footy Show

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BY CURTIS WOODWARD

@woodward_curtis

I am one of the thousands who grew up watching Paul ‘Fatty’ Vautin – the loveable fool of the once much-loved Footy Show.

Too young to remember the player, Fatty became the face of Thursday nights. With old mate Peter Sterling, Steve ‘Blocker’ Roach and Ray Hadley, The Footy Show was much-watch television because you simply didn’t know what was going to happen. It was live and Vautin had no right being an anchor – his stuff-ups became the thing of legend but that was the charm of him and the show.

Whether it was dressing in drag (which eventually saw the demise of Roach and Hadley), 60 Seconds with Sterlo, Anti-Ads or the next breakout comedian (Carl Barron and Anh Do, anyone?) – You just had to tune in.

There was Stuffy the dog, Terry Hill live from Dapto with Nads, Mahatma Cote, Mario, Phil Cass and many others.

Later it was Reg Reagan, ‘Chief’, Jason Stevens and ‘Trent’, Ryan Girdler’s ‘Their House’ and Robbo.

But The Footy Show wouldn’t have worked without Vautin.

Perhaps we’ll never really appreciate how important he was to making The Footy Show work.

He and Sterling played off each other beautifully. It was only Sterlo’s professional that kept the engine running sometimes as Fatty head-wobbled, chuckled and played the clown. He had a “who gives a shit?” attitude and that’s why it worked. Okay, maybe it was more “what am I doing in front of this camera?” but whatever it was – he resonated with those watching at home in their living rooms.

 

 

If you’ve read Ray Warren’s book you will know that Vautin and Sterling found that they loved their meteoric rise from footballers to celebrities. It meant golf in the morning, a punt in the afternoon and annoy Warren whenever they could.

Fatty’s face started to pop up everywhere – companies wanted to use his name to endorse their products.

My dad took my brother and I to Warwick Farm in 1993 for Fatty’s ‘World’s Biggest Barbeque’ – backed by Tooheys. As a 7-year-old, it looked like there were millions of people packed into the racecourse. The only thing I really remember is that it took hours just to get a sausage sandwich. We left before Fatty’s duet with Meatloaf.

Another time he came to Macathur Square shopping centre for an appearance. Hundreds packed an area in front of the escalators. We thought he’d simply walk out onto the stage. Instead, he came down the escalators just like anybody else would. The crowd erupted. Everyone loved him. At one point on stage he was inviting people to come up to join Western Suburbs Magpies players for a quiz. I was going to wear my Magpies jersey but at the last second decided to wear a New South Wales jumper instead. As he was picking people out of the crowd, he pointed straight at me and said, “Yep, you! Oh hang on, you’re wearing a Blues jersey, get stuffed”.

How good is that?

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ql_9mZHNoMQ

 

But at some point The Footy Show became a job for Vautin.

Co-hosts came and went, some with more success than others, but the inevitable was on the horizon.

On Tuesday he was sacked as host after 24 years.

“In the end nothing lasts forever,” Vautin wrote to WSFM’s Brendan Jones who read his texts live on-air Wednesday morning.

“I had a great run, especially for a short, chubby, red-head who played for both Manly and Queensland.

“That’s not a career, that’s a miracle.”

Rightly or wrongly but – mostly wrongly – the old Footy Show as it was couldn’t survive in this new world we live.

There was a time for The Footy Show in all its ridiculous glory and luckily enough we can still watch back on DVD.

This story is for anyone that ever rated something a “5 out of 13” or gave an inappropriate ‘That’s Gold’ in a photo they were never meant to be in. And who hasn’t attempted a “turn it up Fat Man” at the pub? Are we impersonating Ray or are we impersonating Fatty impersonating Ray?

A salute to Paul ‘Fatty’ Vautin and the legendary Footy Show.

Finally, we wonder, what would Vautin say if he ever read this article?

He’d probably give it a “that’ll do me” before disappearing into his local TAB for a bet or two.

That’s fine – he deserves it.

@woodward_curtis

 

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